I guess I just wasn't made for these times
Hey guys, it's been a while. I've been meaning to be better about keeping up with this blog but, hey, shit happens. I had a couple things written in March, but sharing my thoughts on movies and books just didn't feel right, because at that point none of it mattered anyway.
I was in the process of watching my beloved Beans slip away, and it was really hard. On April 19th I said "Bye, Beans, Mummy loves you so much" and I never saw her again. I wrote a lengthy post about that day and the days leading up to it, but I deleted it. I needed to write it for me, but it's something I don't want to share. Instead, I'm going to share something about my favourite animal of all time, and my favourite album of all time and why, for me, they will always be connected.
God only knows what I'd be without you
I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't listen to The Beach Boys. Their music takes me to a good place. A place I often want to escape to. My love affair with the Boys started when I was a wee one, probably with the album Surfer Girl. The title track and "In My Room" are two of my favourite songs. They just make my problems melt away. That's what The Beach Boys have always done for me. Beans was like that, too, so it's no wonder that the two would often accompany me during the toughest of times.
I had this poster in my room when I was young. Not exactly a kids movie, but I respect my parents' choices. If you were alive and kicking in 1988, you're probably already thinking of another Beach Boys song. "Kokomo" is hated by so many, which makes me laugh, because I love it so much. I think a lot of the hate comes from that episode of Full House (you know the one). For me, it's such a dreamy song. The whole vibe of it takes me back to a simpler time. Summertime at the lake...ballet classes, followed by a trip to Sportsland to get hockey cards. I could listen to that song all day. And it was so perfect for the movie Cocktail. I think it should have won an Oscar, or at least have been nominated. But what do I know.
Close your eyes and be still
Fast forward about seven years or so, to the first time I heard Pet Sounds in its entirety. I already knew a few songs, but never had I listened to this masterpiece start to finish. I was in no way prepared. I cried. A lot. Yes, I was an emotional teenager, but I was caught off guard. This was not Surfer Girl. This was so much more. It was musically and lyrically on another level. And it was relatable. Brian Wilson singing "don't talk, put your head on my shoulder...don't talk, take my hand, and listen to my heart beat. Listen, listen, listen" still turns me into a baby every time. It just made me think of when we first adopted Beans. Holding her in my arms at the vet's office, her head on my shoulder. Me saying, "mama's here." I still say that to her picture.
I wish that every kiss was never ending
Beans was so different from any other animal I've known. So much more complex and layered and beautiful. If she were an album, she would be Pet Sounds. It's been almost a week since the album's anniversary and over a month since I lost Beans. I think of her constantly, and miss her more than I could ever say, but I am so grateful for this week of listening to my favourite album and thinking about her. It's like there's a whole new meaning now. When I was younger, I would lie in bed listening to Pet Sounds, thinking about stupid boys, but now I will think of her. The most wonderful cat and the best little friend I've ever known.
Now I will leave you with Pet Sounds (obviously) and a cool video of one of the recordings of "Don't Talk" so you can swoon over Brian Wilson's beautiful voice. And also, I'll share a couple more pictures of the most beautiful girl in the world. Give your pets some extra love today. Hold them close. Make the hugs and kisses last a little longer (but not in a gross way).
Take care, y'all. And remember...
Love is here today, and it's gone tomorrow. It's here and gone so fast.
I'm finally doing it--pulling my insides out and splattering them around for all to see. Here we go!