I wish you'd come back to me and sit by my side
We'd laugh and we'd play again, if only you'll try
I'm sure most of you are aware of the fact that I spend a great deal of time in cemeteries. I've always enjoyed walking around, reading books, writing in my journal and listening to music while on a cemetery bench. Or sometimes I just stroll in silence or sit and stare, often at nothing in particular. It's nice.
I am lucky enough to live about a five minute walk from one of Canada's oldest Victorian cemeteries, that happens to be right across from the ocean. Recently, I've decided to step up my cemetery game by going for a walk through Ross Bay every morning before work. It's a good way to ground myself before the work day begins, and also get some exercise. There's something about breathing in the fresh salty air while being within the grounds that makes me feel relaxed. And on those days when I'm feeling particularly alone, I always seem to discover that I'm not.
I never stop being amazed by the fact that, not only do birds, squirrels and raccoons take up residence in this wonderful place, but there's a family of deer that frequent this spot. Sometimes I'll see them eating or wandering, or resting under a tree, and on a couple occasions I've seen a doe feeding a fawn. It's quite magical, really. I swear that every time I stroll through Ross Bay I stumble upon something that fills my heart with joy. Something that keeps me going.
I used to mostly stick to the paths and walkways, but now I often find myself walking right through the graves. Not just between them, but right on them. Sometimes I stand on top and let my my feet sink in, and if the ground isn't wet, I'll sit down. For me, it's a means of getting closer. Getting to know the people who are buried here. I'm starting to learn their names and taking the time to read the inscriptions on their tombstones and plaques. My goal this year is to memorize the names of the people who rest in Ross Bay by spending time at each grave. I'm sure I could just look at a map and figure out where everyone is, but I would rather be more hands-on in my approach. I will certainly have to do some research as many of the inscriptions have not stood the test of time, but I look forward to it. It's a fun project to take on. One that means a lot to me.
Here is a snapshot from a morning in Ross Bay. Trees and shrubs used to line the edges so you couldn't see the ocean like this. I used to think that I would hate it if they were removed, but it turns out that I really like it. That seems strangely symbolic to me right now, removing what's blocking the way in order to see clearly. Alright, alright, I'll stop. Here's some King Diamond. Now go get some fresh air.
I'm finally doing it--pulling my insides out and splattering them around for all to see. Here we go!